Methods for discharging accumulated emotions. The simplest techniques for emotional release How to deal with children's outburst of emotions

Sometimes you need it. Anyone who is afraid of his own aggressiveness will sooner or later explode anyway: when they have already sat on his neck and got him “to the fullest.” Aggressiveness is not always a bad thing; in the hands of a reasonable person, controlled aggression is a useful thing. The ability to explode with aggressiveness at any second and the next second to smile serenely is an indicator of a high level of self-control and one’s own emotions. If you learn to freely cause aggression, it will soon become easier for you to turn it off, and those around you will begin to treat you with more respect.

However, anything can happen in life. We are all alive, sometimes we get angry and offended, after which we want to somehow relieve the internal tension. How?

Not only from friends and neighbors, but also in popular psychological literature, you can often come across the following recommendation: “If you are angry and overwhelmed by aggression, do not suppress it in yourself, find a way to defuse it. Throw it out in words, throw it out in actions, and you will feel better. If you suppress your emotions, it will have a bad effect on your health.”

Treat such a recommendation with caution: this is a very popular but harmful myth, where half-truths are mixed with ignorance. The pot metaphor is beautiful, but wrong. Wrath is more of a forest fire that will engulf large areas with catastrophic destruction if the first small flame or bonfire is not controlled in time.

This question has attracted the attention of scientific psychology many times, and the results are clear. Experiments by R. Walters and M. Brown (1959), S. Mallick and B. McCandliss (1966), C. Turner and D. Goldsmith (1976), R. Green (1981), M. Zuzula (1989), D. Glass, D. and E. Jones, as well as B. Bushman (2002) convincingly showed that neither imaginary aggression nor outbursts of anger not only reduce the likelihood of promoting real aggression, but, on the contrary, increase it.

Let's see why an outburst of aggression is considered an effective method?

Firstly, people don’t always understand what makes them feel better. It must be taken into account that an outburst of emotions puts a person in an altered state, and against this background, any suggestions are much more powerful. If the psychotherapist authoritatively states that in order to free himself from aggression the client needs to throw out his emotions, introduces the client into an altered state of consciousness and gives suggestions “You have been left behind by resentment and anger,” the client is highly likely to feel improvement. At the same time, you need to understand that the result was given by the specialist’s suggestions, and not by the procedure of defusing aggression and splashing out feelings.

Secondly, the release of aggression and the outburst of negative emotions are popularized, apparently due to confusion: the outburst of emotions is confused with the opportunity to speak out one’s emotions. Or - relieve internal tension with physical pumping. And these are all different things.

Shall we figure it out? For example, a daughter was angry with both her parents and herself, everything was seething inside her, the anger was boiling inside her. What should she do now? The first, quite reasonable option is to speak out your feelings: “I’m very angry with myself and with you, I think I’m about to explode.” The second, also quite acceptable option: go to your room, stamp your inner tension with your feet, or dance to the music so that after that you just want to lie down and relax. The third option: yell your feelings, throw out your anger in the most energetic expressions at yourself, a fool, and at such and such (even more energetically) parents. This is unacceptable, even if it doesn’t sound to the parents’ face.

In addition, you need to very well understand the limitations and pitfalls associated with the intention to splash out your aggression.

First: the desire to relieve tension by splashing out aggression is very similar to trying to relax with the help of alcohol. It is known that a glass of vodka also makes men feel better. Is it necessary to make taking two hundred grams a daily habit, taking into account the fact that soon two hundred grams will no longer be enough?

The second thing to take into account is that this method often helps women and does not help men. Moreover, it often brings them trouble. If in women's screams only internal tension without specific content spills out, then the words of men mean exactly what they say, a man's cry is meaningful and specific, it contains a clear desire to fulfill certain threats. By throwing out his anger, a man does not discharge himself, but winds it up and charges him, and the matter may end not in relief, but in a fight.

And the third and most important thing that everyone should know: this method quickly stops working. Even experts don’t all know that the outburst of emotions and the release of aggression seriously alleviates the internal state only at first, while such a release is something new for a person, while this event distracts his attention. The more the discharge of aggression becomes a habit, the less screaming and even hitting help discharge it. The discharge method stops working, but the habit of yelling remains.

The discharge of aggression, repeated, ceases to work as an emotional response,
only turning into psychopathic behavior.

“When my little brother was angry about something, he would kick the furniture. Our mother said it was his way of letting off steam. Now he's 32, he still takes it out when he gets angry. his anger on the furniture. But in addition, he began to beat his wife, his children, his cat and destroy everything that came in his way,” this is how one reader responded to the psychologist’s recommendation to give the child a special “beating bag” to help him. cope with outbursts of irritation.

Total: as a method of reducing aggressiveness, defusing aggression and outburst of negative emotions are not effective. Moreover, imaginary aggression is more likely to increase the likelihood of real aggression being promoted. It is useful and normal to talk about your grievances (anger, dissatisfaction), it is useful to relieve tension with physical activity (sports, washing dishes, scrubbing floors), but it is not worth throwing out your negative emotions, living through imaginary aggression. The discharge of aggression, when repeated, ceases to work as an emotional response, turning only into psychopathic behavior. But we don’t need this!

What to do with your own aggressiveness

Developed, mentally healthy and emotionally mature people solve this issue without any problems, see →. A realistically thinking person, who is accustomed to thinking first and not worrying, does not often experience violent negative emotions. For a well-mannered person, the negative emotions that arise do not turn into a storm, they are not difficult to cope with, they are completely manageable. There is no need to throw out anything to someone who is not inflaming himself: what happened can be understood, and what worries or enrages you can be spoken out. Restraint in behavior, the ability to restrain one’s negative feelings is an indicator of internal culture and good manners, a mandatory attribute of a business and simply successful person. If you don’t inflate emotions within yourself, then restraint in behavior and expression of your feelings is not at all harmful.

How to deal with children's outburst of emotions

The outburst of emotions by children should be treated in the same way as the outburst of emotions by adults. Children still do not know how to manage themselves well, and children know how to manage their emotions better than adults, and future hysterical behavior should not be encouraged. Cm.

1. "Yes-yes-yes". For 5-10 minutes, try not to be distracted by anything and say “yes-yes-yes” at different intervals, intonation and volume.
2. "Talking in an Unknown Language". Speak, without thinking, any meaningless sound combinations that come to mind that imitate conversational speech.
3. "Meditative Singing". Sit comfortably, relax, close your eyes, open your mouth slightly and sing “A-U-M” with different intonations.
4. "Buzz". Sit, relax, close your eyes, close your mouth, make a mooing sound.

2. Visual techniques

1. "High Energy". Imagine yourself in a bright night sky. Choose the brightest night star. Now... swallow it... It explodes in you, filling your entire body with energy. Energy penetrates all the cells of your body, filling it with a desire to do something, change something, correct it. Be bold, don't wait, act!
2. "Refuge". Imagine a place where you have always felt good, a place that can serve as a refuge for you from problems. Imagine yourself in this place, how you are relaxing in it, moving away from problems and difficulties.
3. "Distraction". Concentrate your gaze on a neutral object, list all its qualities and uses.

3. Breathing and meditation techniques

1. "Respite". Short inhale, long exhale: inhale for a count of 5, exhale for a count of 7.
2. "Meditative Breathing". Take a comfortable position, relax your body. Direct your attention to your breathing. Try not to change the type of breathing, but just monitor it. Tell yourself: “I feel my inhalation... I feel my exhalation...”. After regular training, periods of distraction are reduced, and periods of concentration increase.
3. "Anti-stress". Take a comfortable position. Taking a deep breath, hold your breath for a while. Exhale. Take a deep breath again and hold your breath. This time, accompany the exhalation with the sound “haaaaaaa”. Now breathe normally, focusing your attention on this. As you inhale, say to yourself: “I am”; as you exhale, say “relaxed.” Repeat the exercise 5 times.

4. Motor and tactile techniques

1. "A mountain off your shoulders". It can be done while standing or on the go. Raise your shoulders as sharply as possible, spread them wide back and lower them. This should be your posture all the time.
2. "12 points". Move your eyes, yawn widely, roll your neck, raise and lower your shoulders, relax and move your wrists, clench and unclench your fists, 3 deep breaths, arch your spine, tense and relax your hips, calves, roll your feet, clench and relax your toes.
3. "Self-massage". Massage the area between the eyebrows, the back of the neck, jaw, shoulders, feet.

5. Thinking techniques

1. "Simple Statements". Repeat the following statements to yourself: “I am calm, cool and collected”, “everything is fine”, “everything will be fine”, etc.
2. "How bad is it?". Rank your feelings on a scale of discomfort: 5 - agony, 4 - a feeling of discomfort that cannot be tolerated for more than an hour, 3 - a very unpleasant feeling that can still be tolerated, 2 - moderate discomfort, 1 - mild discomfort.
3. "Non-resistance". Think of the irritating object as a source of energy that has passed by.

It is very important for the teacher to organize the lesson correctly, because... it is the main form of the pedagogical process. The level of hygienic rationality of the lesson largely determines the functional state of schoolchildren in the process of educational activities, the ability to maintain mental performance at a high level for a long time and prevent premature fatigue.

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Emotional releases in the classroom

The modern lesson is characterized by great intensity and requires students to concentrate their attention and exert their strength. The rapid fatigue of schoolchildren in the classroom is caused by the specifics of the subjects: the need for a large number of training exercises. It is very important for the teacher to organize the lesson correctly, because... it is the main form of the pedagogical process. The level of hygienic rationality of the lesson largely determines the functional state of schoolchildren in the process of educational activities, the ability to maintain mental performance at a high level for a long time and prevent premature fatigue.

To achieve high effectiveness of the lesson, the physiological and psychological characteristics of children should be taken into account, and types of work should be provided that would relieve fatigue. The first signs of fatigue may appear in children’s motor restlessness for 12-14 minutes. lesson. Fatigue can be eliminated by optimizing physical, mental and emotional activity. To do this, you should take active rest, switch to other activities, and use all kinds of means to restore your performance.

For this purpose, it is necessary to increase the emotional content of educational activities, their attractiveness, changing the activities of students, optimizing the process of interaction between an adult and a child in the classroom will increase the number of positively experienced emotions, will help relieve the physical and psycho-emotional stress of schoolchildren, will lead to an increase in mental and physical performance in the educational setting students' day.

The positive emotional state of students is important in two aspects:

It activates the higher parts of the brain, promotes their high excitability, improves memory and thereby increases performance;

Promotes mental health.

Learning should take place against the backdrop of a good mood for students, giving them a feeling of joy. The technique of switching attention is based on the mobility of nervous processes characteristic of school-age children and the involuntary nature of mental activity. Switching attention is an important technique of emotional regulation if it is carried out purposefully, pre-planned by the teacher, and used both for didactic purposes and for temporary emotional release. For this purpose, you can use a variety of game situations, sound signals, tasks with a change of activity, and quick response tasks. The group of verbal and stylistic techniques includes folklore, humor, and catchphrases. Scientists indicate that the use of such techniques helps to intensify any activity, prevent or painlessly eliminate a complex conflict, and relieve emotional stress.

Switching activities to correct the emotions of boredom or fear can be done both with the help of words and with the use of color, music, gesture signals, inclusion of objects in the work, and visual aids. Forms of switching activities in lessons include physical education minutes and physical education breaks. Here it is appropriate to use catchphrases, wise thoughts, warm-up games, chants, musical physical exercises, a short poem, a humorous or instructive picture, which are accessible and can be used in working with school-age children.

What is emotional release or relaxation? Relaxation is a relaxation or decrease in tone after intense mental activity. The purpose of relaxation is to relieve tension, give children a little rest, evoke positive emotions, a good mood, which leads to improved learning.

It should be remembered that when conducting relaxation, there is no need to set a goal for students to remember the educational material. Relaxation should free the student from mental stress.

The use of music is very useful for relieving emotional stress. Music allows you to activate work without volitional efforts at the level of involuntary regulation of movements performed, facilitates the performance of work, and relieves dangerous psychophysical stress. Music creates positive emotions, develops a sense of rhythm, musicality, and has a therapeutic effect.

I will give as an example some types of discharge that can be used in the classroom.

Discharge using different types of movement

Students, at the teacher’s command, stand up and perform simple movements (raise their arms up, down, jump, stomp, imitate movements). Actions performed by students may be accompanied by pronunciation when executing commands.

Stories with sound effects.

This relaxation technique, in my opinion, is interesting because it allows students to “revive” after intense work in the lesson. The essence of this technique is as follows: (“the role of sound effects” is performed by students) all participants are divided into groups (2-3 people each) who will portray some characters, sounds, use facial expressions, gestures. The text should be read slowly

(possibly with quiet music). After training, the pace gradually increases.

An unusual irritant that causes an involuntary reaction in students and helps relieve fatigue and tension is laughter.

Expectation of the unusual, special interest also serves to relax students, as it affects the emotional sphere.

Man is a rational creature, but lazy (exceptions are possible). How to reduce the vile influence of laziness and speed up the process of learning new knowledge? One way is through motivators. Motivators are stimuli external to a person, which (if they correspond to his needs and motives) encourage a person to behave in a certain way.

The main function of motivators is to accelerate goal achievement.

Motivators perform the following tasks:

reduce feelings of laziness

increase mental and physical activity

raise/lower mood

reduce discomfort from a particular type of activity.

Positive motivators can be used in lessons.

Visual Imagery: Various images related to the goal.

Motivators are simple and affordable ways to increase student motivation and encourage them to achieve learning goals.

You can also use games - warm-ups or energizers aimed at increasing the tone, group activity and energy of students. Below are examples of games aimed at relieving emotional stress.

Boogie-Woogie (song)

The song is accompanied by movements, and the movements repeat the words. The words hardly change, but only the part of the body that moves changes (right arm, left arm, right leg, left leg, head...).

Right hand - forward,

And then her - back,

And then again - forward

And we'll shake it up a little.

We dance Boogie-Woogie,

Turning in a circle.

This is what we eat! HEY!

Boom-chiki-boom (song)

The song is repeated several times, with only the nature of the singing changing: faster, slower, bass, whisper, etc. The leader sings the line, the others repeat after him.

I sing boom chiki boom

I sing boom chiki boom

I sing boom chicky crayfish chicky crayfish chicky boom

AHA! Oh! Again!

Vereshchagin, get off the boat!

The group is divided into three parts. The first part begins and repeats the words: “Kultykh-bultykh, kultykh-bultykh.” The second part picks up and repeats the words: “Chuh - chuh, chuh - chuh, chuh - chuh, chuh - chuh.” The third part enters last and once shouts the words: “Vereshchagin! Get off the boat! When the third part finishes shouting their words, everyone together should imitate an explosion very loudly - “BA - aaa - X -xxxxxx!!!”

Goal - missed!

The group is divided into two approximately equal teams of “fans”. One team, at the sign of the leader - a wave of his right hand - says in chorus: “Goal!”, the other - to a wave of his left hand, responds in the most sarcastic voices possible: “Past!” The leader “conducts” the choir, making movements with his hands, sometimes alternately, sometimes simultaneously.

Animal choir

The audience is divided into four (optimally) parts. Each part is given the sound of an animal.

For example: “Woof! Meow! Be - e! Oink!” The motive of some light song is used (“A Christmas tree was born in the forest” or “There was a birch tree in the field”). The motive is learned for each sound separately. Then, at the leader’s sign, one or another part of the hall should enter.

Tyr! Pyr! Machine gun! (song)

The words are accompanied by movements and sung at an accelerated tempo.

Punch, poke, machine gun!

The plane is higher than the roof.

Bam artillery

The cavalry gallops.

Chants

“Two flowers.”The leader names the words, and the children repeat loudly after him.

Two flowers, two flowers

Hedgehogs, hedgehogs

Anvil, anvil

Scissors, scissors

Running in place, running in place

Bunnies, bunnies

And now we will say girls and boys together.

“How are you living?”

The presenter asks a question, and the children show the answer with movement.

How are you living? Like this

Are you swimming? Like this

Are you waiting for an answer? Like this

Are you waving after me? Like this

How are you running? Like this

Do you sleep in the morning? Like this

Are you looking into the distance? Like this

How are you being naughty? Like this

I'm riding a tank

Repeat the words loudly after the leader.

I'm riding a tank

I see a cow

In a hat with earflaps

With a healthy horn

Hello cow

How are you doing?

Du - yu - spik - English?

What are you calling me names?

Chica - boom

Repeat words after the leader

Chika boom - cool song

Let's sing it all together

If you need some cool noise

Sing with us - chica boom

I sing - boom - chika - boom

I sing - boom - chika - boom

I sing - boom - chika - raka - chika - raka - chika - boom

A-a-a, o-e!

Again

Hurry up. Everything is repeated again, only in a faster version.

Rocket launch

Prepare for the launch of a space rocket

Eat! Get ready!!! (salute)

Fasten your seat belts!

Fasten your seat belts (clap in front of you)

Enable contacts!

There are contacts on (connect your thumbs in front of you)

Start the engines!!!

Yes, start the engines!! !(rotate thumbs and increasing rumble)!!!

When the hum becomes loud, the leader counts down on his fingers:

5,4,3,2,1 start!!

Everyone shouts: Hurray! Hooray! Hooray!

We are Beautiful

Repeat loudly after the leader

We are Beautiful

We are Smart

We are Skillful and cheerful

We are different from everyone else

We - Gnawing a hazelnut

Come with us

Let's go for miracles

Where there are patterns

Over the rivers and over the mountains

Where are the bue - bue - crayfish

And where do crayfish spend the winter?

Where is it together wow - wow

The Bau family lives

"CAP"

(say words and show hand movements)

My cap is triangular,

My triangular cap

And if it is not triangular,

This is not my cap.

(during the game you need to remove words and replace them with hand movements)

FLOOR, BOW, CEILING

This game is also a good test of attentiveness. It is very simple, its rules are easy to explain. With your right hand, point to the floor and say: “Floor.” Then point to your nose (it will be better if you touch it), say: “Nose,” and then raise your hand up and say: “Ceiling.” Take your time. Let the guys show with you, and you will call. Your goal is to confuse the guys. Tell:

“Nose”, and at this time point to the ceiling. The guys must listen carefully and show correctly. It’s good if you cheerfully comment on what is happening: “I see that someone in the fourth row’s nose fell to the floor and is lying there. Let's help find the fallen off nose." The game can be repeated several times at a faster pace. At the end of the game, you can solemnly invite the owner of the “highest nose in the world” to the stage.

Hippodrome

Purpose: unloading, release of energy, “shout.”

Presenter: “Show me your hands and your knees. Does everyone have two knees? Then go ahead! We will now take part in horse racing at the hippodrome. Repeat after me." The participants repeat the movements after the leader. "The horses went to the start (clap - clap - clap randomly on the knees). We stopped at the start.

They crumple (we clap quietly). Ready, attention, march! The race has begun (quickly slap your knees).

Barriers (we raise our hands as if we were hovering over a barrier). Stone road (we hit our chests with our fists).

Through the swamp (we pull our cheeks). Sand (three palms against palms). Finish line (very fast). Hooray!"

Catching moths

Goal: actively involve students in the game process, raise the overall tone of the group.

Feature: performed standing.

The host points to one of the participants in the game, introducing her as “the hostess who invited us to visit. There were a lot of moths in her house. She invited us so that we could all help her get rid of moths.” Next, the presenter invites all group members to “kill 10 moths,” and the first demonstrates “killing moths” by clapping in the air, clapping on the shoulders and heads of the participants,

on things in the room, etc. It encourages all members of the game to take part in this action. The leader stops the exercise, taking into account the degree of involvement of all participants in the game.

Noise performances

The idea of ​​these mini-performances is simple: the participants are divided into small groups, each of which is given the task of portraying, following the leader, a particular sound that imitates something (birds singing, thunderclaps, etc.). The leader rehearses with each group once or twice, and then begins the story, giving a sign to one or another group to begin their “game.” In conclusion, as a rule, all groups

perform their parts together.

Storming of the Winter Palace.

This mini-performance illustrates the presenter's comic story about a historical event - the storming of the Winter Palace in October 1917. “The Aurora shot rang out” (group No. 1: “Bang-bang!”, group No. 2 depicts crows: “Kar-kar-kar!”). Armed soldiers and sailors rushed to storm the Winter Palace (group No. 3: “Hurray! ", group N 2: "Kar - kar - kar!"). The cadets guarding the Winter Palace fire back (group N 4: "Tra - ta - ta - ta - ta!"; group N 2: "Kar - kar - kar !"). The battle is underway (all groups). Zimny ​​is taken (group N

3: "Hurray!"). You can also illustrate any of the events that are relevant to the activity or a specific date.

"Elephant".

The presenter asks the children: “Do you know how an elephant sneezes? Do you want to know?” Children are divided into three parts, each group learns its own word:

first - boxes

the second is cartilage

third - dragged

And then, with a wave of the leader’s hand, all the children shout at the same time - but each group has their own word. This is how an elephant sneezes.

"Praises."

Place your right hand on your head, stroke it and say: “Oh, what a great fellow I am!” Now put your hand on your neighbor’s head, stroke it and say: “Oh, what a great fellow you are!”

Dwarfs and giants

If the Leader says giants, the children should stand on their toes and raise their hands up; if they are dwarfs, everyone should sit down and stretch their arms forward. The presenter can speak and make different movements, the main thing for the children is not to get lost.

"If you have fun, do this" - a fun and easy game that will appeal to children of different ages and adults. You can play to music. The movements are repeated after the leader. Before each movement, the following is repeated: “If you are having fun, do this.”

The movements can be anything, for example: two clapping hands in front of the chest; two clicks

fingers; one clap overhead; three claps behind your back; jump, and so on, whatever the presenter comes up with at the time of the game. The game ends with the fact that during the last performance of the song, after the words “do this,” all movements are repeated at once.

Thus, we see that the use of various techniques of emotional regulation during the school day allows us to relieve mental and physical stress in schoolchildren, which makes it possible to increase their mental and physical performance, change the child’s attitude towards educational activities, establish friendly relationships between the teacher and the student, student - student, relieve stressful conditions in front of various types of control, increase the importance of one’s own self, which instills confidence in the real possibilities of solving specific problems of training and education.

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Ways to release pent-up emotions

It is human nature to accumulate emotions. When too many emotions accumulate, they can spill out on others against the will of the person himself, irritability appears. As a result, relationships with others deteriorate, more often with loved ones (for some reason many people think that at work you need to be “good”, but at home you can lose your temper). If in this case emotions continue to accumulate, they turn into various diseases: headaches, insomnia, “lump in throat”, hypertension, etc.

There is an ancient tradition in Japan - in every house they kept a special object for beating. The Japanese are reserved people, they bow to each other and smile for any reason. And then they come home and throw out the accumulated emotions on a special object. As a result, they don’t spoil relationships with anyone and live a long time. In the modern version, at enterprises in special rooms they hang stuffed boss. The Japanese will listen to unpleasant words from the boss, bow with a respectful smile, and leave the office. Then he will go into a special room with a stuffed boss, close himself, take a stick in his hands and... with all his heart, so that not a single unnecessary emotion remains. And then comes home to his Japanese wife and Japanese children kind, affectionate and without a drop of irritation. What about us? They ran into me at work - I lost it at home.

Of course, you can’t stock up on a stuffed animal for every potential source of negative emotions. We have to resort to universal “stuffed animals”. One of the most common options is regular pillow, preferably stronger. You may have seen "Jumble" on this topic. Let me give you a real example.

Example #1:

I had a 25-year-old patient. She tried to be “correct,” that is, to restrain all emotions that did not correspond to her idea of ​​“correct behavior for a girl.” She especially “should” love her mother. And the mother, I must say, was very tyrannical. So, over 25 years, a lot of grievances have accumulated. Before the start of treatment, this girl was all tense, constrained, hunched over, and almost always looked at the floor. I told her about releasing pent-up emotions and recommended beating a pillow at home. The next day we meet, I see that some of her fingers are bandaged.

I ask:
- What's happened ?

And she:
- I came home yesterday. Mom went to visit. I took my mother’s pillow, remembered all the grievances that I had accumulated, burst into tears and began to beat this pillow with all my anger. I hit, roar, scream... And suddenly I noticed that the pillow had turned red. She looked at her hands, and the skin on her fingers was torn off. Apparently the emotions were so strong that I didn’t feel pain. And my soul felt very much better!

The treatment was completed after 1.5 - 2 months. By that time, her movements were free and easy, her posture was graceful, her gaze was forward, her nose was raised.

But most of all I remember the phrase:
- I suddenly noticed that the sky turned out to be blue and the trees were green. And the people around are beautiful. And before, behind my grievances, I saw the world only as gray and uninteresting.

Of course, I treated her not only by beating her with a pillow, but the release of accumulated emotions was of great importance.

The "pillow beating" method is effective, but not always applicable. Not everyone has the opportunity to regularly be alone with a pillow and be sure that no one will enter the room at that moment. And not everyone will be able to afford such an abstract method of releasing emotions. Some serious uncles and aunts, even when alone, strive to behave respectably and “correctly” (that is, to comply with the invented rules). For this case, there is another “stuffed animal” - a rug. Get yourself a rug, which you can easily take outside. Buy a carpet beater, preferably a metal one. And take action. Neighbors and family will admire your cleanliness (even if you beat the carpet three times a day). And no one will guess that in the image of a rug you represent him.

But there is one mandatory rule. The blows should not be mechanical. Don't forget that your goal is not to remove dust, but to discharge accumulated emotions. Respectively first you need to stir up all the resentments, anger, etc. within yourself. You have to hate the image of the attack. In this case, your blows will become a manifestation of emotions and their discharge. Remember the soul will relax only when the body is tired. Do not spare yourself, nor the mat, nor, especially, the image of the attack.

The classic “stuffed animal” is the punching bag.

Example #2:

I had to communicate with riot police. They said that after completing a task there is often a lot of unreacted aggressive emotions left. Some people go home with these emotions, some go to the sauna with a beer (or something stronger), and some go straight to the gym to hit a punching bag. Over time, the first ones begin to have problems in the family, some of the second ones become drunkards. The third ones turn out to be the most successful, and preserve their family and health.

There are other ways to discharge accumulated emotions: you can break dishes if you have a lot of extra money, you can chop wood if you live in a rural area. Some people tear newspapers to shreds, while others wring out the towel, as if strangling their enemy. Some young girls told how, after conflicts with their parents, the curtains in their room were torn off (given that the technique was used regularly, the curtains were hung so that they would not tear when torn off).

Example No. 3 (to myself):

When I lived in a dormitory, I hung a chipboard board on the door. If he felt extra aggressive emotions in himself, he attached a drawing of an abstract figure or someone’s portrait to the shield. Then he took kitchen knives and threw them with all his anger at this drawing.It helped very well.

Of course, if you don’t know how to throw knives, then every knife that doesn’t stick will only increase your irritation. In this case, I recommend the game Darst, arrows thrown from three meters stick in 99% of cases. Just choose a larger target.

By analogy, you can come up with your own original way of discharging emotions based on personal experience.

Example #4:

One of my friends got married out of great mutual love. But after 2 months he announced that the matter was heading towards divorce.

I was very surprised:
- How so, you love each other! What's happened ?

- It's all work's fault. From above, the bosses are demanding a plan; from below, the workers are indignant at the untimely payment of wages. All day long I smooth out conflicts, resolve problems, and calm everyone down. I have a hurricane in my soul, but I have to smile at everyone. I come home and at the slightest provocation I snap at my wife. Then I spend the whole evening apologizing, but she pouts and doesn’t talk. She doesn’t see how good I am at work. She only sees that at home I yell at her.

I told my friend about methods of defusing emotions, he promised to think about it.

We'll see you in a month. He:
- Can you imagine, my wife and I are on our second honeymoon!

- Congratulations. How did you solve the problem?

- As a child, I was a goalkeeper in a local team. To develop a reaction, I often threw a small ball at the wall of the house and caught it. After such training my soul felt lighter. I told my wife about everything and we agreed that when I come home from work, she immediately goes into the back room and leaves a tracksuit and a tennis ball in the hallway. I change my clothes right in the hallway, take the ball and with all my emotions throw it at the end of the neighboring house for about thirty minutes. And then, tired and calm, I return home. This is where my wife welcomes me with open arms.

Let me note that throwing an object is a very aggressive action. Our ancestors threw stones at mammoths and spears at each other for many hundreds of years.

One of the most aggressive sports is football. Not only is the ball kicked, but the whole point of the game is to hurt the opposing team. And other team games with the ball are not much less effective in releasing accumulated emotions. Play sports, ladies and gentlemen, and you will be healthy in body and soul.

But that's not all. Instead of sports, you can just as easily jump to your heart's content at a disco. You can “scream” as a fan at a stadium or at a rally. Good sex also helps many people.

Bloody computer games have a very moderate effect. Probably because they are not accompanied by physical activity, and from the point of view of nature it is unnatural.

I talked about methods for discharging accumulated emotions. There are also methods of restraining emotions (music, calming herbs or drugs, water procedures, walks, pets, etc.). All this is good, but holding back an emotion means putting it off for a while or turning it into a disease. Don't overuse the latter.