When you want to howl in pain. I want to howl from a constant feeling of anxiety. Remember that you have legs and a body

I try to watch the news less often because it makes me want to scream. I'm so upset when I hear about everything that's going on in Washington and our economy, and how those who need the most help will get less of it.

You probably already assume that I will continue my verbal tirades - but what good will I do? Will this help improve things in Washington? No... Will it help those in need? No... Will this help me feel better? No!

This will only create unhealthy stress in my body, in my mind, in my emotions and reduce my loving energy and energy field, which can negatively affect anyone who is close enough to me. I call it "being explosive" - ​​when someone (or I) has an energy field that is stressed and angry... It's not attractive! I want to move away from this. Except when sometimes this “impulsiveness” is within me, it is part of me.

Stress, anxiety and sadness contribute to the enrichment of our body with adrenaline, which is believed to protect us, helping us to escape from the saber-toothed tiger so as not to become its lunch. What happens is that when we experience stress or anxiety, our wonderfully designed body experiences an extreme rush of blood so that we become able to defend ourselves, fight and flee.

We don't need that much blood flow in our major organs, our immune system, our reproductive system. We don't need to save our lives! Most of us sit in front of our computers or in our cars or in front of the TV and when we feel stressed, we don't feel the need to fight for our lives. Excessive adrenaline in our systems can cause serious harm to our body and can result in heart disease, high blood pressure, diabetes, immune problems, reproductive organs and more.

I could go on about how stress and anxiety can negatively impact our bodies, our emotions, and our lives, but I'd rather offer you some tips on how to cope with stress. So here are some simple tips:

1. Breathing

It's amazing how many of us unconsciously hold our breath when we meet someone. difficult situation, with fear, as if expecting something.

I was teaching a client and when I mentioned his father, he noticeably stopped breathing. He said he didn't want to remember that part of his past. He carefully hid it from himself because it caused him great pain. Well, we did discuss some of what was hidden - let it come out! My client began to breathe and the flow was restored, and he began to feel much better.

To calm yourself, breathe using “square breathing.” Inhale for a count of four, hold your breath for a count of four, exhale for a count of four, hold your breath for a count of four. Repeat this breathing four times or more.

2. Movement

As I mentioned, stress and anxiety cause a release of adrenaline in our body, which causes our heart to beat faster, we may sweat more, we may feel a tightening of muscles, a spasm in our throat or a tightness in our jaw - we are physically ready to fight or run away. So, it is crystal clear that the best way to calm our stress is movement - take a walk, do some physical exercise, which will help your body burn off excess adrenaline.

3. Stay in reality

Return to the present time! When we're anxious or stressed, we often overthink the future and all the terrible things that could happen. Realize that here and now, right now, you are fine - you are alive, your body is healthy and functioning normally, you still have a house, a car, you live in your own city, you have a choice of what to think about and what to focus on .

Sometimes I have to remind myself of what I have in this life: 2 arms, 2 legs, a comfortable bed, fuel in the car, food in the refrigerator... Right here, right now, I am safe and everything is fine.

4. Remember that you have legs and a body.

When we are stressed and anxious, we start to ruminate in our minds. We forget that we have a body. We forget to breathe or move - we just keep screwing up. So, start wiggling your toes. Extend your toes up and back towards your head to form an arch. Touch your feet and body to the ground. Use my grounding meditation to help you with this.

5.Reduce your intake of caffeine, sugar, salt, alcohol and tobacco!

We are designed to fight or flee when we encounter life-threatening events or creatures. We create this fight or flight response - many of us on a regular basis - through our thoughts or worries. However, we also create an adrenaline fight-or-flight response when we eat or drink caffeine, sugar, salt or alcohol and when we smoke. Reducing your intake of coffee, tea, chocolate, sugar, etc. can definitely reduce your stress response.

6. Contact

Remember, you are not alone! Call a friend. Go somewhere where there are people. Look and smile. Sometimes even going to the store and saying a few words to the cashier can help.

7. Let your energy flow

One of the reasons I love teaching Reiki is that it is a tool that anyone can use anytime, anywhere. If you know Reiki and you are feeling stressed, you can place your hands on your head and this will help you calm down. Or you can place your hands on your back above your lower back (near the kidneys and adrenal glands) to calm your adrenal glands.

Sometimes when we are exposed to stress for too long, we need outside help. Have a massage or session to restore energy balance. Talk to a therapist.

We are created like a river. Energy flows pass through us. When you bring back the flow state, then the stress dissipates. When you learn to keep yourself open and fluid, then you will be able to manage your stress much better.

Translation of an article by my Master Irina Kozlova.

I don't understand how I feel.
It's so hard and bad for me.
I always want to cry.
When I get up from the blood (in lately everything gets worse) when I cook, when I clean. Even now when I write this I want to burst into tears.
I understand that there are people who are a hundred times worse off than me, but
I want to howl and scream how bad I feel. I want to tell someone how I feel. Which is disturbing. But who can I tell this to?
Lately, I have been increasingly haunted by the obsessive feeling that I am annoying people as soon as I start writing about my problems. Sometimes you want to cut off all contacts, lock yourself in a room and never leave and die in the same room from something.
It feels like no one understands. Even if I try to tell something, nothing will work, because:
1.As was written earlier, it seems that I am annoying people.
2. Even if I tell you, no one will understand (it seems) =>
The worst thing:
3. Words disappear. I’m trying to tell something about myself, something that’s hard for me to say and that’s all. My head is empty. I can't say anything at all.
It's getting more and more difficult to go somewhere.
For example, in the evening I can happily discuss with my friend that tomorrow we will go shopping, but the next morning I can’t do anything. I usually try not to cancel all plans, but sometimes I just can’t.
My memory has deteriorated. I forget what I’m asked to do.
And I really want to die.
I'm only 15, maybe this is some kind of difficult transition?

Support the site:

Alisonn, age: 15/07/22/2018

Responses:

Hello. Yes, dear, this is a difficult, transitional age, you can read articles on this topic on the Internet. But the main thing is that all this will pass, in the future you yourself will wonder why certain things were so annoying and upsetting. Take your vitamins, they will give you strength. Ask your mom to make an appointment with a psychologist. Cheer up! Find yourself more hobbies, hobbies, or a part-time job for the summer. Good luck!

Irina, age: 30 / 07/23/2018

Hello Alisson! Why do you think that you are annoying people? Do you have a bad relationship with your mother? This is the most close person- you can talk about painful issues with her. In general - you can tell the essence of the problems in writing - we will help you in some way, we will listen. It’s also great to keep a diary! And write everything that worries you there, express it on paper, so to speak. Believe me, when you read these problems, you will look at them from a different angle. Read more, then your speech will flow like a trickle. As for memory, you can go to the hospital, you can take some vitamins, don’t be afraid of your condition, it’s only temporary and will definitely pass! Honey, you can go to church, talk to the priest - in the sacrament of Confession, tell God about everything - He will always listen and understand, and, most importantly, help.
Hugs to you!

Lu, age: 22 / 23.07.2018

Hello dear Alisonn!

From your letter it seems that you creative person with a rich, inner world. This means that this world can contain an abyss of different experiences, doubts, negative emotions in which you can drown... In order for your life to become more stable, you need to learn to manage your thoughts - because negative thoughts destroy you from the inside. Write how often do you think about negative things?.. Bad thoughts bind you, deprive you of hope and immobilize you. Moreover, they negatively affect your psycho-emotional state, provide constant stress. This stress deteriorates not only the mood, but also the memory and the ability to verbally express one’s thoughts, and it becomes impossible to concentrate. After all, when there is confusion in the head and irritation in the soul, then what kind of balance can we talk about?..
But dear, this situation is fixable: just take control of your thoughts. Stop allowing negative thoughts into your mind - thoughts of sadness, anger, resentment and other things that negatively affect your well-being. At first it will be difficult - after all, you are used to thinking in a negative way, but over time, you will be able to give up bad thoughts, after which you will feel a surge of vigor, joy and opportunity. Nourish yourself positive thoughts- become an optimist! After all, optimism charges you with vigor and inner energy, which is necessary for life! Don’t turn into a constantly whining old lady, always dissatisfied with life... Change your usual thinking pattern. Then you will feel how your life will change, because thoughts influence feelings, feelings influence actions, and actions determine life!
Good luck! I guarantee you that if you follow this recommendation, your condition will improve.

Zhanna, age: 28 / 07/24/2018

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The most important thing

How to love yourself

Two reasons for self-dislike and overcoming them

Self-love helps improve relationships with others, and selfishness is the absence of such relationships. Self-love is what is called self-acceptance. How better person treats himself, the better he treats others. The more he accepts himself, the easier it is for him to accept other people and focus on them.

I have a constant feeling of anxiety. Everything is falling out of my hands, I can’t concentrate on anything. I read on some website that they can order a magpie for the repose of a living person, and you will have the same feeling as I had. How to deal with this? How to protect yourself? How can I determine whether I’m wearing a spell, a love spell, or something else? There is a place for both. Still very interesting fact: When I'm at home, everything intensifies tenfold. It can be so difficult that you have to save yourself with alcohol. I want to howl.

Dear Evgeniy!

Feelings of anxiety may arise from various reasons. This may be due to a previously experienced negative event that greatly shocked. Perhaps you are constantly in an emotional state nervous tension related to problems at work, in the family, and so on. This is compounded by the stress you are currently under. First of all, try to calm down and convince yourself that whatever is happening to you now is:

• A necessary life lesson that you need to learn.
• A situation that you will definitely cope with!

It is very important to remember that alcohol will not solve your problem, but will only make it worse. In addition, we must not forget that gradually this can lead to alcoholism. If someone really influences you, then perhaps that’s all someone wants - to make you a drunkard. Therefore, we pour alcohol into the sink and don’t bring it into the house anymore.

What to do next

1. Test yourself for any negative impact: damage, love spell, evil eye. How to do this - read. If this happens, remove it using one of the methods described on.
2. Do a general cleaning of the house. Throw away everything unnecessary, go through all your things. Look into every corner. If you find something unusual, not yours, put on gloves, put it in a bag, take it out of the house and burn it, while reading a prayer. After this, you can invite a priest to bless your home. Or do an energy cleansing yourself: go around all the corners with a candle and holy water. Move the candle clockwise in each corner, saying words of prayer or requests to the Almighty to help you cleanse the apartment of evil spirits. Then sprinkle the corner with holy water crosswise.
3. Wash all your things. Carefully check the seams and pockets to see if there are any hidden or sewn-in items. If you find anything, do the same as described above. Wash the item well and air it in the air.
4. Try to protect yourself. How to make protection - read.
5. Go to church, confess and take communion. Light candles for your health and the health of all your friends and enemies. At the same time, you must be absolutely sincere in your impulses. Give some change to all the beggars you meet near the temple. Don't talk to anyone and go home.

Every step you take should add strength to you. You must be confident that everything will work out for you. Don't think about who did what to you. Every person gets what they deserve for something like this. Take care of yourself. And they will be rewarded. Try to analyze your life. Forgive those who have offended you in some way, ask for forgiveness from those who you may have offended yourself. And let joy into your life, open up to the world.

If the feeling of anxiety persists after doing all of the above, then consult a psychotherapist. Anxiety disorders are well treated if it is a disease. Just don't delay. The faster you get rid of anxiety, the more likely it is that everything will be fine for you in the future. Good luck!

What to do when you want to howl and scream heartache??? and got the best answer

Reply from [guru]
Take a sedative and go to bed.

Reply from N[guru]
pull yourself together first.

Reply from Andrey[guru]
Howl and scream...t. e. - let off steam...
In Japan, they put a stuffed boss in offices so that everyone can “break in” to him... we can do something like that for you too...

Reply from Evgeniy Kushnarev[guru]
in the forest, maybe the mosquitoes will scatter and the negativity will jump out

Reply from Denis Petryakov[active]
It depends on the reason, take a break, walk around your city, look at different places, write on a piece of paper everything you think, it helps, it all depends on what the mental pain is.

Reply from A cat that walks by itself[newbie]
The most important thing is not to keep it all to yourself. Negative emotions you need to let yourself out. Take a simple piece of paper and tear it. Rip it with all your heart. Release the negativity. Cry. Shout. If you really need support, call a good friend. The main thing is not to keep everything to yourself. And my other advice to you is better to break into the void. On things. Which you don't mind. But not in public. They are also alive and do not have to eat your negativity.

Reply from Elena Morozova[guru]
Howl and scream. It helps. Emotions come out.

Reply from Nataly S[guru]
Do this alone with yourself, cry, scream, howl. At the moment of enlightenment, think about how to live further.

Reply from Qu qu[guru]
swing on a swing until you go crazy ha ha

Reply from Ich liebe to my husband =)[guru]
Endure this terrible time

Reply from Nekit2x2 thick[guru]
I hit the bag, otherwise if I howl, my neighbors will call the mental hospital

Reply from Nina -[guru]
go to the forest and scream there from the heart :-))
At the same time, take a little break from all these problems.

Reply from Olya Kurmanaevskaya[newbie]
Well, I don’t know how to answer...

Reply from New Day![guru]
Believe, repent, start studying the Bible. God is there to bear the burden of every person. Start praying in your own words, without prayer the soul withers even in good families. The results will not slow down!

Reply from Alexa bolotova[guru]
You still have to choose: a comfortable life or swearing. insecurity, but without mental anguish. You can try to separate for a while and look for yourself.

Reply from Mistress of the still waters![guru]
Calm down and don't despair!

Reply from Aibolit[guru]
Most likely, the problem lies precisely in the lack of a normal sex life, see “Caution, SEXOPHOBIA!” (18+):
link .
Try to improve your sexual relationship, and if it doesn’t work or doesn’t help, still consult a psychologist.
________________________________________________

Reply from Nevils Apa?ais[guru]
if you were my wife...

Reply from auditor[guru]
here someone writes about the Bible... And that God will help. it is, of course, true, but not entirely. Yes, the direct answer is to get yourself a lover, a Person who, even without love, will want you. A person for whom it is worth dressing well, waiting to meet him like manna from heaven and after meeting him on wings to fly home to your husband. And you need to clearly decide - a husband is not a stamp in your passport, he is a man who, even if he does not love you, values ​​you, a man for whom intimacy with you is a joy, so he is a LOVER. And it often happens that the lover then becomes a husband and you will regret the lost 10 years. Try, go for it. Good luck

Reply from Vera Aloe[guru]
I also have a problem - my husband is cheating. They change everything, only sometimes and on the sly. And if you’ve already figured it out, then either be patient or try to be interesting to him. You can rape him whenever you really want. Get busy with your life. Try to deprive him of communication with the child on weekends, go to a museum, cinema, skiing, or visit grandma. Jealousy for a child is a very strong feeling; let it suffer.

Most of us have heard stories of women suffering from postpartum depression. Almost all pregnant women and their families fear that this could happen to them. However, only 0.2% of women suffer from severe depression. Approximately 80% of new mothers experience some degree of depression and cry a lot during the first days and weeks after giving birth, and 10% are somewhere in the middle: they experience emotional problems longer, but these problems are not as serious and do not require long-term treatment.

Postpartum depression and hormones

Childbirth is accompanied by a feeling of euphoria that cannot be compared with anything else in life. It’s worth giving birth just to experience this wonderful feeling of relief and relaxation. Mom then enjoys a well-deserved rest and wakes up, refreshed, with the feeling that the world is beautiful.

Temporary tearfulness and feelings of disappointment often appear in the first days after childbirth, especially while the woman is still in the hospital. That’s why this condition is called “three-day sadness.”

During this period, a number of psychological and hormonal changes occur. There may be pain from postoperative sutures, discomfort due to full breasts, and when the uterus contracts, bloody discharge appears - lochia: everything that the body has created over the past nine months comes out. The stomach looks like an empty bag, and the skin on it looks like corrugated paper.

At the same time, the hormones estrogen, progesterone and human chorionic gonadotropin, which were necessary during pregnancy, are replaced by oxytocin and prolactin, lactation hormones. As a result of hormonal changes after childbirth, a woman may suffer from sudden mood swings, from irritability to depression, from excess energy to apathy - just like during the premenstrual period and menopause.

A few days after the birth of our first child, my husband came to my maternity hospital and found me sitting on the floor in tears, among scattered things. And all because I couldn’t find a hairbrush in my bag!

Such changes, which are the result of the monstrous physical and emotional efforts expended during pregnancy and childbirth, normally disappear within a few days.

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Discharge from the maternity hospital and “three-day sadness”

Dr. Ulla Waldenström from Uppsala University (Sweden) associates the appearance of apathy and emotional instability with discharge from the maternity hospital. Her research shows that “three-day sadness” is strongest a day or two after returning from the hospital.

There is a certain logic in this: it may seem that spending a few extra days in a hospital setting is beneficial for a woman, but in fact, it is difficult to get proper rest there.

Amanda, who found herself in a similar situation, recalls: “I gave birth at 2 am, but because I was diagnosed with toxemia (late gestosis), after the birth of the child, my blood pressure was measured every hour. Because of this, I was left in the cold, on a hard and uncomfortable maternity bed, and was only transferred to the ward at 5 am. I happily settled into the relatively comfortable bed, hoping to get some sleep.

But by 5:30 the ward was filled with the cries of feeding babies; and women whose children were not delivered were woken up to have their temperature taken.

By 6:30 everything had calmed down, and just when I thought that I could now sleep for an hour before breakfast, a newspaper delivery man came and began offering Telegraph and Express. After breakfast I got up, showered and went to see my baby, breastfed her and returned to bed with a drink, hoping to get some sleep before lunch.

But then the rattling of buckets, which did not foretell anything good, was heard from the corridor, and an army of cleaners burst into the room and began moving beds and bedside tables.

And this went on all day, and in the evening my husband came, and I begged him to take me away from there.”

Last time Amanda had a planned home birth, the baby slept next to her and she could rest between feedings or rock the other babies in the bed. No one woke her up to take her temperature, and if her family saw that she was sleeping, they did not enter the room and took care of the children.

Surge in activity and development of depression

The correlation between discharge date and tearfulness or apathy is also understandable because returning home with a newborn is a very difficult experience. The phone rings incessantly, neighbors stop by and, if this is the first-born, the child somehow feels that he is left in the care of new parents.

It's only natural that women experience emotional and physical disruptions during these crazy days. But for some, this condition lasts for months, and this affects the woman’s sense of self as a mother and her relationship with her husband and family. If PPD lasts more than a couple of weeks, it is worth consulting with specialists: the longer it lasts, the more difficult it is to treat.

“Often the diagnosis is not made on time,” says psychologist Derrick Dodshon, “because it seems that this is a personal problem of the woman: she may seem sloppy, unkempt, ignorant, while in fact she is depressed.”

Unfortunately, first aid for such disorders usually comes down to phrases like: “Pull yourself together, now you have to take care of the child” or “You have such a wonderful baby, what are you complaining about?”

A woman suffering from PDD may not outwardly appear depressed. She may not cry or be sad, giving the impression of being completely happy person. But a careful observer will notice that she is agitated, overly energetic, overstimulated, or having trouble sleeping.

Susie had her first child when she was thirty. She was social worker and had an excellent understanding of her own psychological needs, as well as the needs of her husband and child. She took a childbirth class, read all the books, and was looking forward to giving birth.

About a week after giving birth, she called me and told me that life is amazing, and she couldn't sleep even for a moment because she was afraid of missing something! She gave herself a deadline to finish the article and decided to have a big dinner that weekend to celebrate the birth of her baby. She mentioned that, of course, the house needed to be tidied up and it was probably time to repaint the walls in the living room!

I warned Susie and her husband that this increased energy expenditure could lead to exhaustion and advised her to consult her family doctor. Together we were able to “catch” her a day or two later, just as her mood had plummeted and she was sitting sobbing in the center of her living room, filled with paint buckets, repeating that she couldn’t handle it all.