How to appear confident. How to look confident? Celebrate your achievements

These people understand perfectly well what this or that posture of a job applicant signals.

We often feel awkward and constrained in situations that are important to us. Is it possible to change this state and demonstrate self-confidence to your interlocutor? There are certain gestures and demeanor that can convince most people of your self-confidence and win them over. So, what should you do to make a good impression on everyone without exception?

Smile

If a person smiles, it means that he is not only happy and satisfied, but also confident. His smile signals that he is not afraid of the world around him and feels completely comfortable. Such people invariably evoke the sympathy of others.

Square your shoulders

A confident person usually does not hunch over or drag his feet. Keep your back straight and shoulders back to radiate strength and make a positive impression on others. It is better to walk broadly, and not mince, timidly looking around.

Look into your eyes

A confident person has nothing to hide. He does not look at the floor, does not hide his eyes and calmly holds the gaze of his interlocutor. It is very important to make eye contact during conversations, because... this convinces your opponent that you are sincere and confident in your words.

Get your hands out of your pockets

Don't hide your hands in your pockets or behind your back. This may convince your interlocutor that you are hiding something after all. It is best to allow your hands to be in a calm and relaxed position. If you are sitting, you can, for example, place them on your lap or on a table.

Watch your appearance

An unkempt person with disheveled hair and the smell of unwashed armpits may arouse the sympathy of others, but it is unlikely to evoke their sympathy. And it’s unlikely to add self-confidence to you. It is worth spending time on your appearance not only before important events, but also on any other day.

Radiate calm

Many people who have to have a difficult conversation start to swing their legs, jerk their knees, or gesticulate too much. It certainly takes your mind off the feelings of fear and anxiety that are burning you up inside. However, such body movements make an unpleasant impression on the interlocutor. First, they clearly show that you are nervous. And secondly, they infect others with the same nervousness. It’s better to calm down and radiate calm.

Don't cross your arms

This gesture is interpreted by most people clearly as a gesture of protection. You demonstrate to others that you do not want to communicate or that the topic of conversation is unpleasant to you. It is unlikely that this will add to your sympathy from colleagues or acquaintances. This position is one of the most unfortunate ones during an interview.

Don't talk too much

Many of us constantly twirl something in our hands during a conversation, cross our fingers, clench our hands into a fist, or constantly touch our faces and run our hands through our hair. This clearly signals our lack of self-confidence. It is best to try to sit still and not make too many unnecessary movements.

It is impossible to please everyone, but in certain situations we need to make a good impression on others. No matter where we are - at an interview or on a date, self-confidence and a positive attitude will always help tip the scales in our favor.

But what does it look like on the outside? confident is there a person in you? Psychologists say that confident maybe only that one Human who loves himself. Of course it must be healthy, adequate love to yourself. You can't indulge in narcissism. However, you need to feel love for yourself, like yourself. And only after this you will gain confidence and communicate freely with others.

But how to achieve this?

Now we will formulate the main characteristics inherent in a confident person, and based on this, we will try to understand how to achieve a confident external image.

In the arsenal confident person required attributes are:

1. Confident look.

A person who is confident in himself has a special look. He is calm and sincere. He has faith in himself and confidence in his own rightness, intelligence, healthy self-esteem, lightness.

Insecure people may look confident on the outside, but their eyes give them away. They have fear, shyness, timidity.

The question arises. How to learn this look? There are techniques that can do this.

Go to the mirror and look carefully at yourself. Try to remember those events in your life that you are proud of. Maybe it's winning a competition or successful defense diploma, and perhaps everyone admires your culinary abilities. Remember and look at yourself in the mirror, you will feel a surge of joy and pride. Your eyes will light up, and your gaze will become brighter and bolder. This is the look of a confident person. Try to remember it.

If later during the conversation you suddenly feel that confidence is slipping away, begin to intensively remember the most successful things in your life and a confident look will reappear.

2. Calm facial expression.

The face of a self-confident person is calm, friendly, and harmonious.

Let us dwell separately on harmony. A self-confident person rarely resorts to methods that do not correspond to his life principles. Therefore, his words and emotions are always truthful. There is no disharmony on his face.

In the facial expressions of a confident person there are no halftones and hints, which are often everyday life. Of course, it would be wrong to assume that a confident person is always uncompromising and straightforward, but basically, there is one specific emotion on his face, and it is always clear what he intends to say.

To learn how to manage your emotions, you need to practice in front of a mirror. But to consolidate the result, it is necessary that facial expressions be based on inner confidence.

3. Style that emphasizes confidence.

How should a confident person dress? In a strict business suit, haute couture clothes, fashionable and always in place?

This is not what we should focus on, although all this, of course, is important. The main thing is that your clothing style should convey valuable information about your essence. So that by looking at you, we can give an adequate assessment.

Moreover, your clothing style should encourage you to perfect your look.

So, it is better for a shy person to dress as brightly as possible. This will attract attention to him. Although it will not be easy at first, gradually the shyness will go away.

If a person is timid in his actions, then a strict business suit will push him to be decisive in his actions.
4. Open and fluid gestures.

You can tell a lot about his confidence by the gestures a person displays. So, a confident person shows his hands to his interlocutor. This is a sign that he is not hiding anything. It is known that arms crossed on the chest are a sign of closedness, fenced off from the world.

He is also not characterized by imposingness and swagger. He doesn't wave his arms.

To come across as confident, you need to be precise with your gestures and only use them when necessary.

5. Simplicity, consistency, truthfulness.

A confident person looks natural. But naturalness does not contradict originality. If you overdo it when trying to create the image of a confident person, you may look too bland, without any striking features. Here we need to find a middle ground.

You shouldn’t focus on your shortcomings; on the contrary, you should behave in such a way that your strengths are more clearly visible.

Many people play someone all the time. They often change their image. This is wrong. The information that a person carries must be constant at least for some time. For example, if today you play the image of a business person, tomorrow a confident person from the world of bohemia, and the day after tomorrow - from the world of politics, then due to the frequent change of image, nothing will remain of your confidence.

Are you confident? Perhaps some may say “yes,” but most, like me, will answer in the negative. Becky Blalock, head of Advisory Capital LLC, has written a book with which any of us can become more self-confident. We bring to your attention the key tips from this book.

A few words before we begin. Leadership and confidence are abilities we are born with. Therefore, self-doubt and modesty are just a condition that we impose on ourselves, and here’s how to get rid of it.

Keep your thoughts under control

The average person has approximately 65,000 thoughts every day, and 85% of them are negative. Most of these thoughts are fears and doubts, and that's okay. Blalock says it's a relic passed down to us from our ancestors. If we extend our hand over the fire, our brain will give a pain signal so that we do not think of doing it again. A defense mechanism that allows us to survive.

But this defense mechanism sometimes works against us. Try to maintain a balance between positive and negative thoughts. Here's what you need to understand: thoughts are just thoughts, they don't have to reflect reality.

Start from the end

This advice is very relevant to me as someone graduating from university. Questions about what I'm going to do next and where I'm going to work lead me to a dead end, but it doesn't have to be that way.

Knowing what you want is the key to success. Everything else should lead you to this.

Start the day with gratitude

"Think about the fact that of the 7 billion people on Earth, many don't have the same opportunities that you have," Blalock says. Therefore, when you wake up in the morning, think about the things for which you can be grateful to life and the people around you. If you start with this, then the entire next day will pass in a positive atmosphere.

Get out every day

An interesting fact about the comfort zone: if we try every day to take a step out of it, it will expand. If not, it dries up, just like our life. Being trapped in your comfort zone is not a pleasant experience, so do whatever it takes to get out of it.

We've all had experiences where we've done something that scared us and turned us off, but it actually turned out to be not so bad. Here's an example Becky gives in his book:

Once I was visiting a military base and was on a parachute tower from which they make training jumps. I decided to try, but when all my uniform was already fastened on me, I realized that I couldn’t do this, turned to the military and said that I wouldn’t jump, because at my home small child. One of the soldiers simply kicked me off the tower and kicked me. When I landed, I realized that I was grateful to him.

There are not always people nearby who can push us out of our comfort zone, so we need to learn to do it ourselves.

Remember that dogs don't chase parked cars.

No matter what you do, there will always be people who do not understand you, who judge you and insult you. Of course, if people close to you say this, then you should listen and think about it, but don’t give up everything just because of other people’s conversations and criticism. People don't like change, and if you change, it hurts them.

Be prepared for falls

A person's strength is tested in his actions after defeat. Once we get back up from failure, we understand what caused it, what didn't work, and we can try again. The more attempts you make, the greater the chance you will succeed.

Find a mentor

Whatever type of activity you are involved in, there are people who have already achieved success in it and can help you with advice or become role models. Find such people and learn everything you can from them.

Choose your companions wisely

Your horizon, Blalock says, is the average of the five people you spend the most time with. Therefore, be careful in choosing your friends. Make sure you spend time with people who inspire and motivate you to reach higher.

Do your homework

In almost any situation, preparation helps you become more confident. Do you have to give a speech in front of a lot of people tomorrow? Say it to yourself several times. Record it on a tape recorder and listen. Meeting new people at work? Find them and their organizations online, look at their profiles. If you are prepared, then you are much more confident. The Internet makes this incredibly easy.

Relax and don't forget about sports

Remember that we biological organisms, and sleep, nutrition and exercise help us keep ourselves in good health. And therefore, they help you to be more confident in yourself. Find a free half hour three times a week and add sports to your life. It’s strange that sport often comes last on the list of priorities.

Breathe!

This tip is the simplest. When breathing, oxygen enters the body. The brain is enriched with oxygen, making us more alert. There is also a hidden trick in this advice: by controlling our breathing, we understand that we can control our body, which means we become more confident in our abilities.

Be prepared to look confident from the outside

You may be terribly worried and afraid of something. But only within yourself. On the outside, you should exude confidence. If you understand that you can’t get rid of fear, try not to show it to people around you.

Ask for help

Don't assume people know what you want. Let them know your wishes and intentions. Once you ask someone for help, you will be surprised how many people there are who truly love helping others. Of course, this is because they are flattered to be asked for advice, but who cares?

Even if someone says no, you can always ask someone else. However, in my experience, this happens very rarely.

Do you have any ways to overcome self-doubt? I can’t think of anything else other than the advice “Imagine the audience in their underwear.”

If you're naturally shy and can't boost your self-confidence, why not fake it? Many people seem to be overconfident and full of confidence when in reality they are insecure and have low self-esteem. The thing is, people don't know what's in your head and they judge you by your behavior. Luckily, you won't be able to show your nervousness from now on, because here's a list simple ways appear confident even if you're not. How to look confident?

1. Speak slowly.

First of all, you must know exactly what you will be talking about. A confident speaker prepares his speech in advance and speaks slowly so that others can better understand them. Some of us speak quickly because we want to finish our speech as quickly as possible or we are afraid of being interrupted. Develop the habit of thinking long before speaking. This quick way fake confidence and look more professional.

2. Keep talking.

Never stop speaking even if someone interrupts and speaks for you. Speak loudly and confidently to show that you are ignoring them. Don't shout back. They will do the same and make your situation even worse. Respect yourself and don't let anyone interrupt you, but if this happens, don't lose control of the situation. You don't want to argue, so don't react to people's provocations.

3. Stand on one leg.

Shift your weight to one leg to show everyone your confidence. This posture means that you are not preparing to defend yourself. However, this does not show your weakness. This way you look like a person who feels no tension and they don't need any protection at all. “There is no one who can try to hurt me.” is what you tell people when you stand on one leg.

4. Move correctly.

To look confident, you need to pay attention to how you move. Nervous people always make sudden and fast movements, so try to move slowly but purposefully successfully with fake confidence. Avoid unnecessary gestures. If you don't know where to put your hands, keep them together near your navel like the most professional speaker.

5. Eye contact.

A mistake that nervous people make during a conversation is when they look at the interlocutor. There is a big difference between staring and making eye contact. Confident people make short eye contacts and can easily look around when we're talking about. Making eye contact can help you appear confident.

6. Dress confidently.

People tend to wear clothing based on their level of self-esteem. If you want to present yourself as a confident person, wear something bright. Insecure and shy people will never wear bright clothes - they prefer to remain invisible in the crowd. Therefore, try not to wear dark colors. An interesting slogan on a T-shirt can also help you look more confident.

7. Improve facial impression.

you sometimes wondering, why don't people talk to you? It may be that you are expressing distress or other negative feelings. Once you improve your facial impression, you will immediately notice the difference. Try to calm down and smile instead of frowning. It can be difficult when you're nervous, but try to focus on positive things and thoughts to appear more friendly and confident.

8. Tell funny stories.

If you find it difficult to talk to people without internal tension, beloved, funny stories can help you cope with this task. Keep a few stories ready so you can tell them when the time comes. This is a good way to relax and feel more confident when talking to strangers.

No matter how hard we try, many of us fail to build confidence. Feigning confidence is effective way show others that you are a successful person. Pay attention to your body language and your speaking skills. If you feel like something needs to change, do it.

Our body can sometimes tell more about us than we would like. Body language can tell our interlocutor what we are thinking about and what we are afraid of. In many companies, people who hire employees have a basic knowledge of body language. These people understand perfectly well what this or that posture of an applicant for a position signals.

We often feel awkward and constrained in situations that are important to us. Is it possible to change this state and demonstrate self-confidence to your interlocutor? There are certain gestures and demeanor that can convince most people of your self-confidence and win them over. So, what should you do to make a good impression on everyone without exception?

Smile

If a person smiles, it means that he is not only happy and satisfied, but also confident. His smile signals that he is not afraid of the world around him and feels completely comfortable. Such people invariably evoke the sympathy of others.

Square your shoulders

A confident person usually does not hunch over or drag his feet. Keep your back straight and shoulders back to radiate strength and make a positive impression on others. It is better to walk broadly, and not mince, timidly looking around.

A confident person has nothing to hide. He does not look at the floor, does not hide his eyes and calmly holds the gaze of his interlocutor. It is very important to make eye contact during conversations, because... this convinces your opponent that you are sincere and confident in your words.

Get your hands out of your pockets

Don't hide your hands in your pockets or behind your back. This may convince your interlocutor that you are hiding something after all. It is best to allow your hands to be in a calm and relaxed position. If you are sitting, you can, for example, place them on your lap or on a table.

Watch your appearance

An unkempt person with disheveled hair and the smell of unwashed armpits may arouse the sympathy of others, but it is unlikely to evoke their sympathy. And it’s unlikely to add self-confidence to you. It is worth spending time on your appearance not only before important events, but also on any other day.

Radiate calm

Many people who have to have a difficult conversation start to swing their legs, jerk their knees, or gesticulate too much. It certainly takes your mind off the feelings of fear and anxiety that are burning you up inside. However, such body movements make an unpleasant impression on the interlocutor. First, they clearly show that you are nervous. And secondly, they infect others with the same nervousness. It’s better to calm down and radiate calm.

Don't cross your arms

This gesture is interpreted by most people clearly as a gesture of protection. You demonstrate to others that you do not want to communicate or that the topic of conversation is unpleasant to you. It is unlikely that this will add to your sympathy from colleagues or acquaintances. This position is one of the most unfortunate ones during an interview.

Don't talk too much

Many of us constantly twirl something in our hands during a conversation, cross our fingers, clench our hands into a fist, or constantly touch our faces and run our hands through our hair. This clearly signals our lack of self-confidence. It is best to try to sit still and not make too many unnecessary movements.

It is impossible to please everyone, but in certain situations we need to make a good impression on others. No matter where we are - at an interview or on a date, self-confidence and a positive attitude will always help tip the scales in our favor.

Irina Gorbunova

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